Struggling Toward a Growth Mindset

 

My mum took this on a walk a while ago, a couple of years now.  East Sussex is SO beautiful.  This is where I wish I was today

I’ve had a lot of down days recently, a lot of “I can’t seem to…” This morning I listened to a really helpful audio about Growth Mindset, where it suggested challenging the thoughts with “what is this situation teaching me?” or “I’ll make a tweak and see what changes” or “I haven’t got past this point before, but I’m willing to try and do things differently, so this time might be different…”

My cynical mind says “what is this situation teaching me?” = that I’m as rubbish at dealing with stress as usual, as unable to move in the world unlike others, and as crap as ever I was.  The more loving higher self bit of me says – ‘you know what? You didn’t sleep at all well last night and you ALWAYS feel sad, self-critical and defeated when you’re tired, and you often don’t even notice you’re tired and link the feelings till later.  So!  Today I noticed for you before it was even midday – its 11.35, score! You know now to be kind to yourself for the rest of the day, understand these feelings of being crap and worthless are sleep deprivation, habitual patterning and a need for some very quality food today.  Have an avocado. Oh, and watch some comedy at some point, don’t expect too much of yourself productivity-wise.  Go to bed earlier tonight and reap the better consciousness tomorrow.  You’re welcome!  Always here, MessyHead! By the way, that bedhead is actually dead cute, don’t bother to brush your hair today!”

My higher self can be anything from a provider of metaphorical tissues and a hug, to her own brand of dodgy comedian.  She’s markedly less mean than my cynical self, who has nothing good to say about me and frankly, needs some therapy I can’t afford.

So while today was going to be a feast of me writing something very meaningful indeed, now it’s this: some days I’m not anywhere near 100% and that just is.  Other days will be better and I’ll say something profound then.

Today I checked in, and that counts. Doing it a bit differently.